When I was a kid, my dad would haul me out of bed early on a Sunday morning, order me into my ‘Sunday best’ including tights without holes and shoes that pinched my feet because I only wore them occasionally, and pack all of us into the VW van to go to church. We were part of a Community of Faith in another denomination, and these gatherings were a little sparse, so we drove about an hour, with a lunch to share and met at a little frame church just north of Trenton. In many respects I feel like I’ve come ‘full-circle’ in ministry because Bethel resembles this little church (Wooler Friends Meeting) down to the coloured glass windows, but minus the two wood stoves.
Church was an all-day event. Because most families traveled fairly long distances to worship, we always shared a meal together, and all of us kids played together for most of the afternoon. I really DID love being part of the community, but never was impressed that I had to get up early every Sunday morning to GO TO CHURCH of all things – not to watch cartoons or play in my yard. I also was not happy with the two hours of driving, and the whole day being consumed with this one single activity.
So whining was often a part of my Sunday morning. One Sunday, I whined harder at my Dad than usual, and asked him right out ‘why oh why’ he thought church was so important. And my Dad, being my Dad, took this question very seriously. After some thought, he said:
“Because sweetheart, every time I go, I come home a little kinder and a little wiser. I think you benefit from this and I know I benefit from this.”
Huh. Go figure. Going to church was actually good for you?
Well it turns out that my Dad was totally on to something.
You see, it turns out that the World Health Organization has declared ‘loneliness’ as a global health crisis. You can all read the statistics above – I copied and pasted it directly from the WHO website. If you read the whole article it names that loneliness is problematic for about 1 in 6 of us; with teenagers and seniors experiencing the biggest crisis. It also says that loneliness directly impacts health, life satisfaction and longevity. I don’t think you all are surprised by this; I know I’ve spoken to you about it before. And all of this was totally made worse by the isolation that we all experienced during the pandemic.
So where does church attendance come into all of this? Well – let me see if I can summarize some of my reading for you (course work reading. Sorry that all of you are inflicted with me thinking through all of this every week in my blog! But also, thank you for letting me think through all of this in my blog.)
It turns out that people who attend church at least weekly – have 25-35% reduced mortality (as in you’re less likely to die), and enjoy about 7 more years of life. People who attend church regularly are less likely to engage in risky health stuff like smoking and drug use (although aren’t big into diet and exercise – hello UCW potlucks). Not only that, but people who attend church regularly enjoy better mental health – and the research says that there’s a 20-30% less incidence of depression. (all of this information is available here). Now its really really important to note that this is ‘correlational’ rather than ‘causal’. Which means that going to church doesn’t necessarily ‘make’ you enjoy all of these health benefits. These health benefits just are ‘friendly’ with church.
So all of this to say, my Dad really was onto something. Going to church is associated with a healthier and happier life. I think we all intuitively know that. I also believe that its part of our theological heritage; that gathering is good and necessary for our spiritual and emotional well-being. We also all can see how not gathering in community has terrible effects on our well-being.
So what’s happened that going to church is seen as old-fashioned at best, and abusive at worst? Why aren’t we all shouting from the roof-tops “look how much better things can be!!!”?
Well – I wonder if its because we turned gathering into something that benefits ‘us’ – gets us ahead and makes us better personally, instead of gathering being something for everyone. Something that not only benefits ourselves and not ‘the other’, or the community at large. I wonder if once again we’ve taken the message of the Gospel and skewed it to be only about ‘us’; and have turned God into our personal benefit giver kind of like a candy machine where you put the ‘prayers and gifts’ in at the top, and it dispenses a treat at the bottom. I also wonder if its because we want all of the ‘benefits’ of gathering for worship ourselves and we don’t want to share this with others because….. well maybe because we want all of it ourselves. Or maybe its because we are too busy being ‘the best’ at gathering and have forgotten that its not a competition for the prizes of health and well-being.
And that turns it back into being an individualistic and lonely enterprise, doesn’t it.
This wondrous gift of well-being is for all of God’s people, not just for our benefit. And maybe its time we thought about gathering because others are better off because we do.
Reverend Lynne Gardiner
Rev. Gardiner ministers at Bethel United Church in Perth, Ontario. Her blog, The Church Mouse, is where this reflection first appeared.